hazy shade of winter – thoughts from september

and so the weather has cooled down a bit. whether it will last or not, no one can say. this is texas after all.

speaking of the weather… these last few couple of weeks have made me wonder about my move-to-portland dream… i think we’ve had maybe four gloomy days in two weeks down here, and while the gray weather can inspire my imagination, it can also make my heart so tired and achey.

ever a conundrum, this girl.


even through the haze that has hung over my eyes of late, there are glimmers of light every day. sunlight breaks through the clouds and i breathe deep again for a moment. a lungful big enough to get me ’til the next one.

the thing is – i’ve been here before. in the hazy shadows of discomfort and disconnection.

and it’s not forever. mourning has always turned to joy, the night always to morning.

to be honest, in the past, it’s felt like the end. but i know better now.

grace has never let me down. the god of beauty and wonder and rewritten stories… has never let me down.

he has brought me out of the shadows and he will do it again.

he has wooed me out of lonely mountaintops and he will do it again.


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I think thoughts. I write them down.

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